easter Archives - pnw mountain mommy

I figured out this whole Easter candy thing.

I suspect it serves the same purpose as Halloween candy.

Bribes.

This morning, after a healthy bowl of oatmeal and blueberries, I fed the Cub chocolate eggs in the bath while combing through his accumulated dreadlocks.

Also, the bath water was freezing.

I had filled the tub while Ben was taking a shower and apparently that was enough for our hot water heater to say HAHAHAHA. NOPE. So, the Cub stood in cold water eating chocolate while I worked at combing through the seven cups of detangler I had smeared all over his head.

I came away victorious, and he came away covered with chocolate. It was mutually beneficial if you discount the ‘getting clean’ portion of bathing and only focus on the curls. Which is what I do. Because that’s how parenting works. 50% success rate is like… a SOLID shelter-in-place day. So, go me.

I’m down to six chocolate eggs. Which means, the Cub’s hair will probably only be presentable for the next few days. When the bribes dry up, he’ll just live matted with dirt and crumbs; a feral bike-riding beast who scoots around the yard terrorizing my flower beds and demanding sesame street videos from his nest of snarls, toy cars, blueberry stains, and cherry-petal-encrusted-feet.

Sending love from on top of the hill,

I got a text last night at 9:30 from the Easter Bunny.

She wanted me to know that there were eggs out front. She had tucked a couple in some tulips, a few behind the daffodils, three near the cedar tree. She wanted me to know where they were because she knew I wasn’t an ‘Easter mom’. I have yet to dye an egg or purchase chocolate. I haven’t made a goodie basket or busted out the pastels. I haven’t let my toddler do any holiday-related crafts. What even is a holiday-related craft?

You see why the Easter Bunny had to step in.

Luckily, I’m on extremely good terms with the Easter Bunny. We’ve been friends for a year now, and she’s willing to throw me a cadbury bone during this childhood benchmark. All she asks in return is I occasionally grab an item at the grocery store if we’re going, or send Ben over for a handyman project from time to time.

We live across the street from her.

Did I not mention that? Her name is Rebecca. She’s lovely.

So thanks to Rebecca and her generous bunny ways, we had a successful egg hunt this morning and the Cub was delighted and had many questions about why the “Beaster Bunny” wouldn’t stick around after leaving all these eggs. The best I could come up with was: “The Beaster Bunny has to head home. She’s tired! She’s healing from a foot surgery! She needs to put up her paws and enjoy a cup of coffee. She’s earned it. She loves you and can’t wait to bring you more eggs next year.”

It looked like that explanation wasn’t going to cut it, but then he realized that all the eggs were full of chocolate.

So, there you go. Easter. Nailed it.

Sending love from on top of the hill,

Chocolate Detangler

Easter. Nailed It.